Category: Blogs & Articles

Acephobia & Anti-asexual hate crime

Excerpt:

«What is anti-asexual hate crime?

Any offence should be treated as an anti-asexual hate crime if the person who experienced it or anyone else feels it was an expression of acephobia. Anti-asexual hate crime can include verbal abuse and violence from neighbours or strangers. Because people’s asexual identity is not always visible to strangers, anti-asexual abuse can often be concentrated in settings where the targeted person and perpetrator know each other. That can include verbal abuse or unwanted sexual touching from acquaintances and anti-asexual domestic abuse from family or partners. This also includes actual and threats of so-called “corrective” rape, to “fix” the person’s orientation.

These crimes are less easy to recognise but it is equally important to record and address them in a manner that addresses their motivation of hostility. To qualify to be recorded as a hate incident, a report needn’t include anti-asexual language. It is enough for a reporting person to perceive that it was motivated by acephobia.»


Read the whole article here.

#MeQueer

Excerpt, translated:

«When a stranger tells you that your sexual orientation (I consider that an important part of myself) doesn’t exist.

Ridiculous, right?

“Asexuality doesn’t exist.”

There.

To my face.

It’s not a laughing matter for me.

His “opinion” is my every day life.

#MeQueer»


Read the whole article here.

Ein Ass im Bett

Translation: An ace in bed

The following comments were made on an article about asexuality.


You can read the whole article here.

Translation:

Points of view

Dear Alex, what you’re describing here, labeled as a type of sexual orientation (In your case the non-existence of one, respectively) is nothing more than an inherent low sex drive. I’m making that diagnosis without being a medical doctor or a psychologist, but from my own experience.


As a man, I’m familiar with phases of completely overheated horniness, where every street is overflowing with the hottest and most desirable women, and other times of total disinterest where you ask yourself how a man could ever find attractive about these short-legged, fat-assed creatures.

Good luck for your life! Maybe you’re interested and talented in spirituality and then asexuality is almost a blessing…


Translation:

Asexuality from the perspective of a sexual partner

I see it similarly. Being in a relationship without sex is hard for the sexual part. It doesn’t matter whether asexuality, depression or medication have caused the other one’s loss of libido. You’re regularly (as a woman at least every 4 weeks) confronted with the task to deal with your  lust on your own because the object of desire isn’t interested in it. You quickly feel left alone with the problem. Compliments, kind words or maybe snuggling in front of the TV simply aren’t the same. Even if it’s meant well, being in bed with a listless partner who shows no initiative, is not fun either.
So if there can never be any sexual contact due to asexuality for example, an important part of ​​the relationship is disturbed and strained. To compensate, it would have to be a nearly perfect match in all other areas. In general, I find it difficult to imagine a purely asexual relationship. What distinguishes that from a close, trusting friendship that goes through all ups and downs? That you don’t ask for exclusivity in others? I know friends who live together and even help each other with financial problems. I, personally can even feel secure with a good friend who will help me when things are crappy. The mentioned butterflies in the stomach, to me, are just a sign of being infatuated and not of love.


Translation:

the perfect relationship

Fortunately, today there are tree partnerships for vegetarians
and not just gray ones, but also in voluptuous green shades
add a little oxytocine and every fir branch provides unforgettable, transcending excesses for each icicle.


Translation:

Sex doesn’t equal sex

What a cute and funny article! I wholeheartedly wish you that you’ll find all the romance that you want. However, I do have one piece of advice (you can’t know this): For sexual people, it’s actually also “making love” (connection, hormones, perspiring closeness etc.) and when you’re in love, but can’t physically indulge yourself in this intense way, something’s simply missing. Therefore, having sex with people whom you don’t love, wouldn’t be a substitute. But thank God, there is the internet for dating. I wish you good luck!


Translation:

A little too much fuss

I assume that there are many asexuals.

You can imagine that with some adipose couples, the physical deficiencies make the exchange of bodily fluids unlikely.  There, the romantic candlelight dinner ought to be a higher priority than the attempt at a mutual workout.

One thing that the article doesn’t seem to state is to what extent does physicality matter at all and what does he hope to gain from such a relationship.


Translation:

Not the first time

It isn’t the first time that I’ve read such an article online about this topic. I’m interested in this topic, though I’m not afflicted by it myself. One thing I always find remarkable, and that’s that in all these articles, the afflicted never write whether they’ve had a complete checkup? I mean, hormonal etc. and all the way up to their psyche? I always get the feeling that at some point in life, they’ve resigned to this and that’s just how it is. Under normal, natural conditions, the phenomenon asexuality wouldn’t spread, as, strictly speaking, reproduction shouldn’t be happening, that would pass on these genes. It would just occasionally appear as a genetic defect. How much influence our hormones have, regarding our behavior, cannot be emphasized enough. If certain hormones are missing or the opposite, it can lead to extreme conditions like for example the complete loss of smell or other things. My thesis is that a majority of asexual people aren’t merely asexual but that actually a different physical cause is deluding them to believe in this condition, as this condition isn’t of biological value in regard to the conservation of species.


Translation:

Those who want to live without sex, have never had good sex.

That’s a pity, but at some point, it can’t be changed or only with difficulty. In the end, this applies: Live and let live. If asexuality happens willingly, society has to tolerate it. On the other hand, asexuals should also tolerate the sexual nuances of other people. THAT’s how simple life can be.


Translation:

Whether asexuality is genetically predetermined,…

…or acquired through fate or nurture, that’s the question.

In the past, people tried to rid young people of their sexuality (e.g. masturbation) via conveyed feelings of guilt. Today this happens in a similar way, but with people who aren’t interested in sexuality much, whom differ from the “norm” and could be “healed”.

The past’s compulsory uptightness has simply been replaced by today’s compulsory uptightness. Both have compulsion, societal pressure in common that can lead to mental impotence or frigidity.

That is the sad result of the “sexual revolution so that today some “sexual deviants” feel compelled to explain themselves.

I don’t know if it will reassure the article’s author, but he isn’t anything special with his problems, because people whom are interested in sex and sexually active can struggle to find the right partner, too. Because an open and and more or less taboo-free person won’t become comfortable with an uptight person. The problem is how to find out as soon as possible with a potential partner. Because quite often, things aren’t as they look at first glance.

It still should be clarified whether asexuality may really be disguised uptightness, impotence or frigidity.  And thus, the inability to signal the (potential) partner their true desires.


Translation:

I feel bad for you!

I don’t mean this ironically. I honestly pity you, like I pity a deaf person whom will never experience the beauty of Calla’s voice or the melancholy of a Nocturne by Chopin, or a blind person whom can never watch a ballet or a sunset. The only consolation for you and other asexuals is that you don’t know what you’re missing.

If you call an orgasm meager and its foreplay boring, it could have been with the wrong partner, which you probably rule out on principle. It would be interesting to learn whether this sexual disorder affects more men or women?

An orgasm and the mutual game of giving and enjoyment to the orgasm, is one of the most beautiful and intensive things that you can experience in a human relationship. It’s like a pas de deux at dancing that improves the more intensive and the more intimate both dancers can give themselves to each other and become one in the dance. It depends on the partner’s skill to emotionally and physically empathize with the other person. That requires trust.

Maybe you lack this skill of physical interpersonal communication? What a pity for you!

[Comment by the editor about the use of autism as a metaphor and speculations on people’s thoughts and feelings, which they have removed both.]

“Ich bin asexuell”: Was das wirklich bedeutet – und was nicht

Translation: “I am asexual”: What that really means – and what not

The following comments were made on an article about asexuality.


You can read the whole article here.

Translation:

Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s right and good to have places to go to if it’s obvious that your own sexuality isn’t “common”, thus, as developed as in others. Especially during adolescence,  you compare and are uncertain and have to find your way. I just don’t understand the motivation to have to come out. If you have a romantic homosexual relationship, you’ll be (hopefully not) discriminated against by homophobes at the most, but it doesn’t matter to the public AT ALL if and how you have sex. That’s only important for yourself.

The coming out and wanting to educate, in my opinion is exhibitionistic. Look at me, I’m different, acknowledge me. That is the message. But most people couldn’t care less if, how and how often you have sex and how you experience it.


Translation:

“We are absolutely a sexual minority, because sexuality doesn’t mean that you have sex.”

sexuality means at least that you have a sexual (that is: carnal) interest. That’s why it’s called SEXuality, not attractionality.

asexuality is the lack of sexuality and sexual interest. That’s why it’s not a sexual orientation. or simply put: bald is not a hair style.

hairstyle is a construct of hair and not possible without hair.

if you don’t find it fitting for yourself, you should not use the term asexual for yourself.

or do you have a compelling reason wanting to be a “sexual” minority?


Translation:

“When people ask me today … how I personally experience sex”

Weird, no one asks me that. No one cares. I wouldn’t give out that kind of info either, because I don’t feel the tiniest need to make intimate matters “visible”.

That asexuals take part in the CSD, seems bizarre to me. It’s like a bald person attending a hairstyle competition. No sexuality isn’t a “different” sexuality, but simply none.


Translation:

Hm… I have trouble understanding your need to come out. As Sany has already said, who even asks something like that? And why is it relevant? In my group of acquaintances, we never ask how often and how much sex someone has and what types (alone, as a twosome or with multiple people) you practice. Or whether someone doesn’t have any interest in sex. I have several coworkers who have been single for apparently forever. But I would never ask them if they are asexual. I wouldn’t know anything about those kind of discussions either.

With homosexual acquaintances, it’s a different level. If you want to live free and open, you’ll also want to show your partner, your way of living. Or one coworker who came out as a woman last year. There it’s more about the societal aspect of acceptance. Whether my acquaintances actually have real sex or whether they just snuggle “romantically”, is none of my business. I find it a little blatant.


Translation:

At some point I’m overwhelmed by all these sexual preferences that you have to come out as. Asexual, aromantic, biromantic but asexual, alone, with multiple people, with different utensils, only in a certain surrounding, … Please don’t misunderstand me. But I agree with Corra. When someone comes out as their sexual orientation, so that he doesn’t have to hide with everything that’s socially a part of a relationship, then that’s right and important for his life. But I don’t want to know what everyone is doing in bed, if you e.g. only experience lust on your own or live in an asexual relationship with a partner. That’s something I’d tell one very good friend at the most. But not in a booth in a pedestrian area. In comparison: I know a coworker’s long-term partner. No big deal. But we don’t tell each other what we each experience in bed. So much for the social relevance of an orientation. ???


Translation:

@thanks  KlingtKomisch

I’ve had a good laugh when I continued to read this thread and found a sexual minority in the nonsexual one.

What is that supposed to be? If I don’t drive a car or don’t watch TV, I’d say I won’t care about these topics.

If I don’t care about sex, what am I doing at a demonstration that plays with the manifestation of lived sexuality, if I don’t have anything to play an am not interested in it?

Things are starting to get crazy!

Biased Against Asexuals? Let Me Count the Ways

Excerpts:

«Is there really a bias against asexuals? Do other people judge them more harshly? Are they less interested in talking to them? Would they discriminate against them – for example, in hiring?

In a way, bigotry against asexuals seems silly. People who are uninterested in sex are not hurting anyone. They are not disrupting anyone’s life. They don’t engage in the kinds of sexual behaviors that some people consider taboo.

And yet, they are different from heterosexuals, the people who are typically held up as the standard against whom others are judged. Differences can be just that – neutral ways people differ from one another. But as with so many other differences, such as those based on gender or race or marital status, differences are too often viewed as deficits. It is entirely possible that asexuals are seen not just as different, but inferior

«Participants were asked to indicate their comfort with hiring members of each of the groups, as well as their comfort with renting to them. Both the college students and the community members felt significantly less comfortable hiring asexuals than heterosexuals, and significantly less comfortable renting to asexuals. They were equally uncomfortable hiring or renting to the other sexual minorities – bisexuals and homosexuals. The key distinction was between heterosexuals and everyone else.»


Read the whole article here.

EX ASESSUALI: le testimonianze dei guariti

Translation: Ex asexuals, witnesses of the healed ones

Submitted and translated by “L’afobia esiste” @stop.afobia_ita

Excerpt, translated via Google translate:

«Although asexuality is not an offense such as pedophilia, which harms third parties causing serious damage and trauma, it still generates heavy emotional, psychological and social disturbances and repercussions both in the person affected and in any partner. However, if society has rightly condemned pedophilia, this has not yet happened with asexuality, due to the lower social and physical danger of the pathology, but above all because of the political pressures linked to an unjust extremism of meaning politically correct.

Therefore subjects affected by asexual disorder should be treated as pedophiles, or induced to take care of themselves in order to try to reduce the damage or, if possible, heal.

It would be nice to be able to delude ourselves that asexuals will die out, since they do not reproduce. Unfortunately, however, they are all creatures born of ignorance forced by the dictatorship of minorities and ignorance, as you know, is always pregnant.
»


Read the whole article here.

ASESSUALITÀ, l’elenco delle sottocategorie aggiornato con le ultime novità

Translation: Asexuality, list of the subcategories updated with the last news

Submitted and translated by “L’afobia esiste” @stop.afobia_ita

Excerpts, translated via Google translate:

«These subjects unjustly claim the existence of a fourth sexual orientation with respect to the only three existing sexual orientations: straight, homo and bisexual. Their absurd slogan is: “No sex, no problem” because, according to what they would like to convince themselves, they could live happily even without sexual pleasure, without masturbation, without frustrations due to the absence of sex. This, of course, is only a bitter attempt to cover up the malaise in the person who lives it, due to the pathological lack of sexual desire. In fact, many of them have aggressive attitudes towards sexuality, being rightly people who have repressed their sexual impulses for physical impossibility to have relationships or psychological motivations.»

«We cite therefore, by way of example but not limited to, only a few labels including, that of greysexual, lithosexual, akoisessual, fraysexual, apotosexual, aegosexual, autochorosexual, quoisexual, asexual, cupiosexual, demiromantic, greyromantic, demiromantic, poliromantic, poliromantic, poliromantic pomomomial skolyoromantic, lithromantic, sapioromantic, antisexual, queerplatonic, semisexual, etc.

It is not necessary to go into unnecessary details analyzing one by one all these far-fetched categories, also because it would be an operation that would please these demented endorsing their delirium. It is sufficient to limit ourselves to saying that they are all the result of the same pathological weakness: that of feeling at all costs part of a group, identifying itself in a category.

And for each of these labels there is a minority group that claims to have the right to socially redeem their specific, deserving of protection, fetishistic delirium linked to the repulsion of sex.

Because if society has discriminated against homosexuals and Jews in the past, it would be very serious today to discriminate against them too! Any person who wakes up one morning and claims to create a label based on their dog’s cock, through which to claim rights, must be automatically considered to be the custodian of the right not to be discriminated against.
»


Read the whole article here.

ASESSUALITÀ: le risposte ai dubbi dei lettori

Translation: Asexuality, answers to the readers’ doubts

Submitted and translated by “L’afobia esiste” @stop.afobia_ita

Excerpt, translated via Google translate:

«1- DOES ASEXUALITY EXIST SCIENTIFICALLY?

ASEXUALITY understood as sexual orientation DOES NOT EXIST.
There is asexual disorder, understood as pathology. Unfortunately, this confusion has been generated by LGBT associations that have recently improperly categorized asexual disorder as ASEXUALITY.
This social drift was reached on the initiative of the lobby of the LGBT associations, always thirsty for political power deriving from the consent of the minorities, in an attempt to attract people affected by asexual disorder by improperly raising this pathology to the rank of alternative sexual orientation (recte, negative ).»


Read the whole article here.

“ASESSUALITÀ”: una nuova etichetta nata per giustificare un grave disturbo sessuale

Translation: Asexuality, a new label born to justify a serious sexual disease

Submitted and translated by “L’afobia esiste” @stop.afobia_ita

Excerpt, translated via Google translate:

«The lobby of LGBT associations, in fact, mistakenly tries to label these disorders as sexual orientations, even comparing “ASEXUALITY” to homosexuality, unfairly invoking criteria of freedom and non-discrimination to protect this minority. In reality, wanting to make a forced comparison, “ASEXUALITY” should be more properly compared to pedophilia, as both disorders are harmful sexual deviations. If pedophilia harms, unfortunately, third parties abused, “ASEXUALITY” is in any case detrimental to the personal balance of the person affected and any partner. The direct effect of asexual disorder is, of course, the impairment of one’s social and relational life conduct, which is affected by the difficulty of relating to a primary and atavistic drive such as sexual instinct. This damage is as serious as that caused by the opposite disorder, or hypersexuality, more commonly known as “nymphomania”.»


Read the whole article here.

Discrimination Against Asexual People Is Surprisingly Commonplace

Excerpt:

«It’s simple: Ace people made a choice, not that of which concerns the state of their sexual attraction, but everything else surrounding it. Bringing them ridicule from all walks of society. Almost universal disdain.

Straight people, gay people, bi/pan people, and every letter in the “LGBT+” acronym, have subsections of acephobic people. That is perhaps the most debilitating thing about such an observation — the people who you entrust most with having your back would suddenly turn on you and judge your existence to be trivial — inheritors of homophobic legacy. The very same type of bullshit we’re accustomed to by white nationalists when they claim that “everyone is at least a little bit racist”, to make a point about bigotry being an innate trait to be unlearned, not one that should be learned, to be avoided.»


Read the whole article here.

Asexual oppression and all that

 

Excerpt:

«“Oh yeah, asexuals are just invisible, we don’t experience real oppression/legalised discrimination/violent oppression/other things go here as well.”

Usually used contrasting us to other queer groups, in order to explain why we’re so much better off than they are.

Let’s take this apart.

First of all, invisibility is a form of oppression. We’re all clear on that, yes? This isn’t exactly a new idea. It’s not a new idea to sexual queer folk either. In a comment on this post about anti-asexual attitudes by Stephanie Silberstein, Sciatrix writes:

Well, on the other hand–isn’t constant and (to a degree) enforced invisibility a form of oppression all on its own? Oppression doesn’t have to be violent or about legal discrimination to count. Or, well, if it does, I see plenty of other complaints about Glee in particular and media in general that are suddenly invalid: desexualized and perpetually single queer characters in contrast to straight characters who get to have romantic relationships; unequal time put on relationships of queer and straight characters, stereotyping of queer people in media, Magical Gays, bisexual erasure, and so forth. If all oppression has to come down to violent or legalized discrimination… well, we’ve just drastically restricted the breadth of what it means to be an oppressed group under a privileged hegemony.



There does not exist a quota of “you must have this high a risk of experiencing violence due to your orientation” before you’re allowed to say you’re oppressed, mmkay?»


Read the whole article here.

Why We Need Mental Healthcare Without Asexual Erasure – And How to Get There

Excerpts:

«The first person I told was my therapist. Big mistake.

She immediately responded by telling me that my asexuality would go away as I got older (I was 18 at the time). She also said that she thought that my lack of interest in sex was probably “just a symptom” of my depression.

I argued and told her I didn’t think it would go away. It was true that I’d been experiencing depression since long before puberty started, but it just didn’t feel like a symptom to me – it felt like an identity.»

«One partner thought he could make me sexual, so he pressured sex when I didn’t want it, and I gave in because I grew up in a world where sex is considered an obligation in relationships.

It wasn’t until I felt validated and assured in my identity that I gained the ability to talk about my sexuality safely and openly, making my relationships healthier because I was able to communicate more honestly and (assuming a respectful partner) ensure my needs were respected. 

If my therapist had actually supported me instead of denying my own self-wisdom and understanding, I might have gained those tools much earlier in life.»


Read the whole article here.

Christianity and Asexuality

Excerpts:

«Asexuality is in an odd place, compared to the other minority sexual orientations, when it comes to Christianity. Some religiously conservative Christians tolerate or even applaud asexuality while condemning all other non-heterosexual orientations. In that way, asexuality escapes the vitriol to which the LGBT* community is subjected*. But this leniency is often based out of a misunderstanding of asexuality– and it’s by no means universal. I know of other aces who’ve been told, by Christians (and others) that their asexuality is sinful, or even that they’re going to hell for it.

I’ve observed four primary areas of tension between asexuality and Christianity. The first is the mistaken idea that asexuality is voluntary, or is basically celibacy. The second is that asexuality isn’t a choice, but is still commendable. The third is that asexuality is preferable to being gay. The fourth is that asexuality is sinful. These ideas are probably familiar to anyone who does ace 101, but I believe this four ideas are so prevalent in Christian discussions of asexuality because of deeper beliefs that run strong in many Christian communities.»

«Christians who believe asexuality is sinful may be coming from one of a couple of places. If they are talking to or about female aces, they may be influenced by misogynistic ideas about women existing solely for marriage, children, and the sexual pleasure of men. If they’re speaking more generally, they may be operating off of the incorrect assumption that the nuclear family is the basic unit of, and integral to, Christianity. (If you are one of those Christians reading this, I suggest you go back and read the Matthew verse I referenced above.) Or, homophobia may have convinced them that heterosexuality is the only good sexual orientation, and therefore anything else must be condemned. Or, they may be under the mistaken impression that asexuality is “unnatural” and therefore sinful.»


Read the whole article here.

Asexuality and Rape

Excerpts:

«That problem is how asexuals are exceptionally prone to the outskirts of the rape culture when they interact with and date sexuals. This is especially true of romantic asexuals.

Now what I mean by this is not that they are especially prone to forcible rape and the types of rape we most focus on when discussing rape, though these occur far too often and can affect asexuals just as much as sexuals.

What I mean are coercive rapes. Those where one’s autonomy and free choice is put to intense pressure and manipulation in order to force a technical consent, which is nowhere near the gold standard of mutual enthusiastic consent or informed consent. This can occur in many forms:

– Using alcohol to try and remove ability to withdraw consent
– Stating that whether one’s partner loves you or not is wholly dependent on whether or not they put out.
– Wearing down resistances to no so they accept to shut you up.
– Lying about the effects of sex without desire in order to manipulate a partner into giving sex.
– And using cultural memes towards how sex is owed to your partner to exact sex from an unresponsive and not-enjoying-it partner.

As well as many others.»

«And asexuals may just be another victim of this idea that “yes should be a default” in a committed relationship, but they are one especially prone to it. Not only are they ones for whom the default is usually no, but they are usually ignorant about the “accepted rules” most sexuals use to navigate the rape culture.»


Read the whole article here.

Va-Va-Bullshit: How Latina ‘Spicy & Sexy’ Stereotypes Affect Asexual Latinas

Excerpts:

«Unsolicited advice from family members who “just don’t get asexuality” is a common occurrence, with Latinas recalling numerous times when they were told they “just haven’t found the right guy,” are immature or are in denial. But ideas about Latina bodies and sexuality also come from outside the family and beyond the Latino community. Greater society, perceiving Latinas as innately hypersexual, remark that asexual Latinas should “stop playing hard to get” and “take the stick out of their butt.” The underlying message in these comments, according to Foster, are always the same: You cannot possibly be anything other than what I say you are, and because I see you, Latina, as a sexual object, I have access to your body in a way that supersedes your autonomy and your right to your own body.»

«But characterizations of Latinas as inherently hypersexual and possessing contemptibly high fertility rates additionally produce another, more insidious form of harm; these myths make it impossible for asexual Latinas to exist in the country’s psyche, obliterating Latinas’ experiences from dominant discourses on asexuality and creating an unnecessary tension for asexual Latinas. Queenie, for instance, has been accused of abandoning her culture and trying to be white because, as a Latina, an identity embedded with notions of sexuality and motherhood, it’s thought that she can’t possibly be really asexual.»


Read the whole article here.

Asexual Men and Rape

Excerpt:

«Part of being “a real man” is having sex with a lot of women (before eventually being ensnared by the old ball-and-chain, of course). Celibates are not “real men.” Virgins are not “real men.” The abstinent are not “real men.” Those with low sex drives are not “real men.” And, crucially, asexual men are not “real men.”

So of course asexual men endure the standard array of pathologization, criticism, mockery and disbelief when they come out as asexual: “there must be something wrong with you,” “you’re just repressed,”  “you’re just a late bloomer,” “you’re a misanthrope,” “you can’t get laid,” “you’re gay, aren’t you?”»


Read the whole article here.

What about asexuality?

Excerpt:

«What do you have to say about asexuals? These are people who claim they experience no sexual attraction or desires towards a particular person. Asexual advocates differentiate celibacy (I.e:chastity) as a choice and asexuality as part of the individual or born with (that is a way of saying hardwired). I would appreciate you guys giving answers on how to refute the claim, or rather the differentiation of chastity and asexuality. Because let’s be clear, if CMI questions the claim sexual orientation is hardwired or homosexuality is inherited or wired in [some]brains, why not question ultimately the alleged wiring of all sexual orientation, including asexuality? My point is that if homosexuality, bisexuality, transsexualism is not hardwired or something someone is born with, or is a psychological pathology or social disorder or more biblically, a sin, then surely there should be counter arguments that refute asexuality as hardwired and different from chastity.»

«By the way, there is one context in which asexuality is sinful—in marriage, when one chooses not to engage in intimacy with one’s spouse (this of course does not include various cases where someone is unable to do so). Paul only allows husbands and wives to abstain from intimacy by mutual consent, for a limited period of time, and then only for the purpose of prayer (1 Corinthians 7:5).»


Read the whole article here.

13 Stories of Asexual and Aromantic Oppression

Excerpt:

«Some things happened in the asexual and aromantic community this week and for the most part they were positive. I won’t go into detail now because this post is not about that. One thing that did happen was aces and aros getting some attention on the blogging platform tumblr. And not all of it good attention.

What I found particularly disturbing was repeated assertions that asexual and aromantic people do not experience oppression. This is so incorrect.

First of all, let me be clear what I mean when I say oppression. The word doesn’t necessarily mean being locked up or killed. It doesn’t have to mean systematic and deliberate acts by a Government. Oppression, in the context of social justice, means behaviours and words that marginalise and cause harm to a minority. It doesn’t have to be overt and it doesn’t have to be deliberate. All that’s required is that the victims are marginalised and that the behaviour is harmful: physically harmful, emotionally harmful, it doesn’t matter. It also doesn’t matter whether a person who is not part of the marginalised group in question thinks the act should be considered oppressive. It is up to the people experiencing the harm to say whether they feel oppressed.»


Read the whole article here.

Prejudice Against “Group X” (Asexuals)

Excerpt:

«In a recent investigation (MacInnis & Hodson, in press) we uncovered strikingly strong bias against asexuals in both university and community samples. Relative to heterosexuals, and even relative to homosexuals and bisexuals, heterosexuals: (a) expressed more negative attitudes toward asexuals (i.e., prejudice); (b) desired less contact with asexuals; and (c) were less willing to rent an apartment to (or hire) an asexual applicant (i.e., discrimination). Moreover, of all the sexual minority groups studied, asexuals were the most dehumanized (i.e., represented as “less human”). Intriguingly, heterosexuals dehumanized asexuals in two ways. Given their lack of sexual interest, widely considered a universal interest, it might not surprise you to learn that asexuals were characterized as “machine-like” (i.e., mechanistically dehumanized). But, oddly enough, asexuals were also seen as “animal-like” (i.e., animalistically dehumanized). Yes, asexuals were seen as relatively cold and emotionless and unrestrained, impulsive, and less sophisticated.

When you repeatedly observe such findings it grabs your attention as a prejudice researcher. But let’s go back a minute and consider those discrimination effects. Really? You’d not rent an apartment to an asexual man, or hire an asexual woman? Even if you relied on stereotypes alone, presumably such people would make ideal tenants and employees. We pondered whether this bias actually represents bias against single people, a recently uncovered and very real bias in its own right (see Psychology Today column by Bella DePaulo). But our statistical analyses ruled out this this possibility. So what’s going on here?»


Read the whole article here.