Category: Being called emotionless, sociopath, psychopath

Translation via Google Translate:

alets⁷
@yoongidelrey:
“cancel if you want but I die before being in a relationship like this……….”

andrea
@almostcomrades:
“It is that this would not even be asexuality in itself (if it exists) because there should be no pleasure involved on the part of who is considered asexual in fact, such a person could not fully consent. The comic at the end illustrates pure narcissism”


alets⁷
@yoongidelrey:
“why in 2021 there are still “asexuals””

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P*teiro gun shot; puteiro = brothel

Acephobia & Anti-asexual hate crime

Excerpt:

«What is anti-asexual hate crime?

Any offence should be treated as an anti-asexual hate crime if the person who experienced it or anyone else feels it was an expression of acephobia. Anti-asexual hate crime can include verbal abuse and violence from neighbours or strangers. Because people’s asexual identity is not always visible to strangers, anti-asexual abuse can often be concentrated in settings where the targeted person and perpetrator know each other. That can include verbal abuse or unwanted sexual touching from acquaintances and anti-asexual domestic abuse from family or partners. This also includes actual and threats of so-called “corrective” rape, to “fix” the person’s orientation.

These crimes are less easy to recognise but it is equally important to record and address them in a manner that addresses their motivation of hostility. To qualify to be recorded as a hate incident, a report needn’t include anti-asexual language. It is enough for a reporting person to perceive that it was motivated by acephobia.»


Read the whole article here.

Biased Against Asexuals? Let Me Count the Ways

Excerpts:

«Is there really a bias against asexuals? Do other people judge them more harshly? Are they less interested in talking to them? Would they discriminate against them – for example, in hiring?

In a way, bigotry against asexuals seems silly. People who are uninterested in sex are not hurting anyone. They are not disrupting anyone’s life. They don’t engage in the kinds of sexual behaviors that some people consider taboo.

And yet, they are different from heterosexuals, the people who are typically held up as the standard against whom others are judged. Differences can be just that – neutral ways people differ from one another. But as with so many other differences, such as those based on gender or race or marital status, differences are too often viewed as deficits. It is entirely possible that asexuals are seen not just as different, but inferior

«Participants were asked to indicate their comfort with hiring members of each of the groups, as well as their comfort with renting to them. Both the college students and the community members felt significantly less comfortable hiring asexuals than heterosexuals, and significantly less comfortable renting to asexuals. They were equally uncomfortable hiring or renting to the other sexual minorities – bisexuals and homosexuals. The key distinction was between heterosexuals and everyone else.»


Read the whole article here.

Shit People Say to Asexuals

Need more info on asexuality? I have a book out. Buy or borrow a copy of The Invisible Orientation: http://juliesondradecker.com/?page_id…
Want to know more about why these statements/questions are inappropriate? Read the info sheet with explanations:
http://swankivy.com/writing/essays/ph…
If we come out to you, we probably don’t mind discussing our orientation, but pretty much anything recited in this video is probably a bad idea to say to us. . . . Don’t be afraid to talk to us or ask questions, but sometimes on the sensitive topics, you might be better off doing your own research. You may also like these for further reading/watching:
“How to Be an Asexual Ally,” my article:
http://goodvibesblog.com/how-to-be-an…
Asexual Bingo (my video of much more offensive quotes): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncoHJo…
The Asexual Visibility and Education Network:
http://asexuality.org

Thank you to my collaborators Nick, Axx, Kathryn, 65dgs, TungstenEdge, ampersandstringquartet, Dallas, Ace Amoeba, Chel, Rynn, Michael, CocoaPanda, Muffin, Sara Beth, and Raingoddess2040.

Letters to an Asexual #15 (Asexual Prejudice & Discrimination)

This is #15 of a series in which I read correspondence between me and people who have questions, comments, or–more often–misconceptions about asexuality.

This one covers a question we sometimes get from a vocal minority in the queer community claiming asexual people absolutely do not have problems worth discussing because the very worst thing we ever experience is “hurt feelings” over people not acknowledging our orientation.

Here are the citations and links for everything mentioned in the video.

Siggy’s Breakdown of asexual queerness (orientation and gender identity):
http://skepticsplay.blogspot.com/2010…

My appearance at Creating Change (where I was invited to discuss asexuality at an LGBT conference):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3VnHa…

My interview in the Gay Voices section of the Huffington Post:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06…

The numbered list backups:

1. JOB AND HOUSING DENIAL:

* The study documenting asexual discrimination: “Intergroup Bias toward ‘Group X’: Evidence of prejudice, dehumanization, avoidance, and discrimination against asexuals”
http://gpi.sagepub.com/content/15/6/725

* An anecdotal account of possibly being fired for asexuality:
http://thecupcakeace.wordpress.com/20…

* A follow-up to this story by the same person:
http://thecupcakeace.wordpress.com/20…

2. ADOPTION DENIAL:

* Discussed in Olivier Cormier-Otaño’s lecture, wherein he mentioned asexual couples getting denied adoption because “If you’re asexual, you’re not fit to be married.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-cI61…

3. CONSUMMATION LAWS:

* These may change, but as of the creation of this video, the states requiring consummation for a marriage to be legal are here:
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Which_state…

* For laws regarding consummation as it refers to a couple that includes one immigrant, please see this document:
http://www.state.gov/documents/organi…

4. ANTI-DISCRIMINATION LAW:

* In New York, SONDA, the Sexual Orientation Non-Discrimination Act, mentions asexuality as one of the sexual orientations that cannot be discriminated against legally.
http://www.ag.ny.gov/civil-rights/son…

* In Vermont, asexuality is included in a “protected category” list under “sexual orientation”:
http://hrc.vermont.gov/

* The proposed legislation in Texas that names asexuality as a protected class is reported on in a news article here:
http://news.yahoo.com/could-texas-cit…

* The law paper by Elizabeth Emens, accepted by Standford Law Review, which thoroughly examines how asexual people live in a prejudicial environment and how that works out legally, is entitled “Compulsory Sexuality.”
http://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cf…

5. “CORRECTIVE” RAPE:

* Huffington Post discussed “corrective” rape and how it’s hurting the asexual community here:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06…

Here is a Tumblr thread where another user and I discuss rape threats:
http://swankivy.tumblr.com/post/50603…

* You can see some of the rape threats I have received here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncoHJo…

* And you can read about my experience with a man forcing himself on me after I told him I wasn’t interested here:
http://juliesondradecker.blogspot.jp/…

6. POOR REPRESENTATION IN MEDIA:

* Godiva’s is a Canadian show that is canceled. It featured an asexual heteroromantic man, Martin. He was “fixed” with testosterone supplements.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godiva%27s

* Huge is an American show that is canceled. It had an asexual aromantic woman, Poppy, in a minor role. She mentioned her asexuality once during a discussion with a fellow camp counselor and it was never mentioned again.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huge_%28…

* Shortland Street is a New Zealand show that is still going on as of this writing. It featured an asexual biromantic man, Gerald. His asexuality is examined deeply throughout the series.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shortlan…

Episodes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgju7Q…

The bad House episode is called “Better Half”:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Better_H…

7. MISDIAGNOSIS WITH A MENTAL DISORDER:

* DSM definition of Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder:
http://www.behavenet.com/node/21614

8. DEPRESSION AND SUICIDE:

* The Trevor Project: http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

* Materials created by AAW for the Trevor Project’s volunteers:
http://asexualawarenessweek.com/trevo…

13 Stories of Asexual and Aromantic Oppression

Excerpt:

«Some things happened in the asexual and aromantic community this week and for the most part they were positive. I won’t go into detail now because this post is not about that. One thing that did happen was aces and aros getting some attention on the blogging platform tumblr. And not all of it good attention.

What I found particularly disturbing was repeated assertions that asexual and aromantic people do not experience oppression. This is so incorrect.

First of all, let me be clear what I mean when I say oppression. The word doesn’t necessarily mean being locked up or killed. It doesn’t have to mean systematic and deliberate acts by a Government. Oppression, in the context of social justice, means behaviours and words that marginalise and cause harm to a minority. It doesn’t have to be overt and it doesn’t have to be deliberate. All that’s required is that the victims are marginalised and that the behaviour is harmful: physically harmful, emotionally harmful, it doesn’t matter. It also doesn’t matter whether a person who is not part of the marginalised group in question thinks the act should be considered oppressive. It is up to the people experiencing the harm to say whether they feel oppressed.»


Read the whole article here.

Prejudice Against “Group X” (Asexuals)

Excerpt:

«In a recent investigation (MacInnis & Hodson, in press) we uncovered strikingly strong bias against asexuals in both university and community samples. Relative to heterosexuals, and even relative to homosexuals and bisexuals, heterosexuals: (a) expressed more negative attitudes toward asexuals (i.e., prejudice); (b) desired less contact with asexuals; and (c) were less willing to rent an apartment to (or hire) an asexual applicant (i.e., discrimination). Moreover, of all the sexual minority groups studied, asexuals were the most dehumanized (i.e., represented as “less human”). Intriguingly, heterosexuals dehumanized asexuals in two ways. Given their lack of sexual interest, widely considered a universal interest, it might not surprise you to learn that asexuals were characterized as “machine-like” (i.e., mechanistically dehumanized). But, oddly enough, asexuals were also seen as “animal-like” (i.e., animalistically dehumanized). Yes, asexuals were seen as relatively cold and emotionless and unrestrained, impulsive, and less sophisticated.

When you repeatedly observe such findings it grabs your attention as a prejudice researcher. But let’s go back a minute and consider those discrimination effects. Really? You’d not rent an apartment to an asexual man, or hire an asexual woman? Even if you relied on stereotypes alone, presumably such people would make ideal tenants and employees. We pondered whether this bias actually represents bias against single people, a recently uncovered and very real bias in its own right (see Psychology Today column by Bella DePaulo). But our statistical analyses ruled out this this possibility. So what’s going on here?»


Read the whole article here.